Are you stuck in limbo trying to move forward but with each step forward you are knocked three steps back?
Below are 12 (plus a bonus) possible reasons why you cannot move beyond stuck.
1. Attitude: A negative attitude about your circumstances equals negative energy and a negative outcome.
Try looking on the bright side even if life tends to only show the dark side.
2. Blaming: Pointing fingers, blaming others get you nowhere except where you are-stuck.
Try standing in the mirror pointing your finger at yourself. After all, you are the boss of your life, and no one forced you to make your decisions but you.
However, do not waddle in the past too long, for if you do, you will be stuck in the past.
3. Clutter: Having a cluttered mind blogged down with un-useful baggage only takes you to Never-Neverland. Never happy. Never satisfied. Never a win.
Accept whatever happened, process it, and let it go.
Not everything or everyone is meant or deserves to travel along your personal journey. So, make room for those who and new possibilities.
4. Distractions: Turn off the TV, and your email and social media notifications then place your phone on vibrate and put it in another room.
Because guess what? It ain’t going anywhere until you stroll through it or delete it. And if you miss something, it was not meant for you to see.
Distractions can steal time. Do not let it rob you.
5. Focus: Well, the lack of it.
Focusing on too many tasks is exhausting; believe me, I know all too well.
Multi-tasking is not what it used to be with so many technical distractions dinging in the background.
Try focusing on one task or idea at a time, and not move on to the next until that one has been completed. More will get done this way, and anxiety will be less.
Have you found why you are stuck? Continue reading to discover your reason
6. Gratitude: Gratitude is the best attitude cause when we underappreciate what we have it appears we have nothing when we have plenty.
By focusing and appreciating the things that truly matter gives true gratification and fulfillment of abundance that pushes us to do more for those things that matter in our lives. In return, we get stuff accomplished.
7. Habits: Bad habits are like poison. Doing too much of anything could destroy us. This includes binge-watching (time management), consuming too many unhealthy foods, and living in the past.
Being mindful breaks bad habits if it takes 14 or 60 days to get rid of them, one first must be cognizant that they are bad habits.
8. Identity: Have you lose yourself to society?
Not knowing who you hinder you from finding your life’s purpose.
It is important to discover when you lost yourself to the world that has injected its opinions of who they deem you should be is the key to being and living your authentic self.
It is no easy task, but you can be found.
9. Kindhearted: Find it difficult to say no, and not regret saying it?
No, is a sentence and no one should feel guilty about saying it.
Being an empath myself, I have had my share of difficulties saying no and not retracting it in the next breath.
But saying no to others means saying yes to you, your own desires, and valuable time spent on identifying you and your purpose.
I say, say no, and say it like you mean it the first time.
10. Mindset: Is your mind shackled to what society trained it to believe? Chained to the lie, you are to work your younger years, retire old, and die poor and broken?
Sorry to be so morbid, but that is how many live their lives believing we live to only pay bills and die.
Life and death are both certainties, but life is so much more than working yourself into the grave.
Life is what we make it, and God created it where we all prosper by giving each of us gifts to obtain abundance and joy.
Our mindset-thoughts, plays an important role in how we live between our born date and decease date.
We can either live out loud and unapologetically or live in the shadows afraid to think for ourselves and grow from the seeds gifted us.
Caring about what others think of us controls give others control of our minds and life, fear keeps us from thriving, and our attitude will keep us from flourishing with purpose.
Fine-tune your way of thinking, be opened-minded, and see what may bloom.
11. Opportunity: Do you believe the lack of opportunity is keeping you planted in sinking sand?
In 2020 many gained and lost. Those who gained adapted to the way the world starting to operate. While others were not so sure of how to adjust to the quick changes.
Doors have not always opened for women or people of color. So many times, we fit in where we can.
But many women are shifting their mindsets and going for broke. Meaning they are making a way out of no way no matter the cost.
Women are amongst the fastest growing business owners, and it does not look like they will be slowing down anytime soon because sisters like us win.
Being pushed out of a job beyond their control, forced to work from home due to the 2020 virus lockdown allowed women more time to create or work their side hustles: a win-win situation.
No doors have ever magically opened for me. It took hard work, determination, and preparation when opportunity knocked.
But with today’s technology, opportunities are available at our fingertips from in the comfort of our own homes. To me, the virus forced us to seize opportunities while allowing us to utilize the gifts we were blessed with.
Permitting us to build our own doors of opportunity on a strong foundation.
12. Perfection: Nothing is perfect. So, if you are waiting to perfect your craft, a business plan, or figure, you will be waiting forever.
Perfectionism is like a disease with procrastination as a symptom.
Striving for perfection only causes us to overthink and underproduce; it causes fear and doubts in our abilities to do.
If you are a perfectionist, you are fearful of failing or succeeding, you care too much about what others think of you, and you will continue to be stuck in an unrealistic world if you continue to let perfection hold you back from doing.
13. Comparing: Do you find yourself scrolling through social media feeds comparing yourself to others? If your answer is yes, sometimes, you will be stuck on Fantasy Island until you realize and appreciate your own talents and beauty.
When we compare ourselves to others, we are telling ourselves we are not enough. But what and how God created for you is for you.
You are divinely crafted to stand out from the crowd and serve in your own unique way.
Be you, your incomparable self.
I hope you find your way out of the maze of stuck with these 12 (plus the bonus) reasons why you cannot move beyond stuck.
Please leave a comment if you need more reasons as to why you cannot move beyond stuck.
I am attempting to age gracefully as I count down to turning that remarkable age 50 (one year from Feb 22nd).
But as I maintain my weight-loss; aging with the ticking hands of time. I’ve noticed the loss of elasticity in areas of my face and neck. My skin isn’t as firm as it was in my youthful thirties or even mid-forties.
So, now I’m asking myself the question. Should I consider having some cosmetic work done on my face?
I know they say black don’t crack, but I do wonder standing in the mirror pulling my face tightly and upwards toward my ears, asking the questions many of us sisters have asked ourselves, how much younger would I look if I had these parentheses (smile lines) filled in? Or attempt to erase my crow’s feet caused by gazing at the nurturing sun?
Perhaps you’ve asked, why would I want to freeze the facial expressions I use to communicate a point, just to slow down the natural progression of aging?
I guess the most important question I must ask is do I dare to remove a part of myself? After all, each line is a imprint left from a moment in time. Landmarks of my journey telling my story how I have smiled with joy and cried from pain.
Gas and needles?
With products lining the shelves having the cure to slow down the process of aging, dermatologists and plastic surgeons claim to have the powers to reverse the aged thin skin by using electronic devices and needles; which can prove costly and may require anesthesia.
Botox (Botulinum toxin) is FDA-approved to treat headaches and chronic migraines before they start. It is also used by some to decrease sweating in armpits and to treat some eye disorders.
Botox was stumbled upon by two Vancouver doctors around 1987 who realized the toxin had a place in the billion-dollar beauty industry.
This paralyzing product has been reducing the appearance of wrinkles and helping to prevent those lines from forming.
Feeling the fillers
As I stated, my parentheses have become more and more pronounced with my weight loss. But, I can’t and won’t stop smiling. LOL!!! I have too much to laugh and grin about.
Not sure if I am feeling the fillers either with the parenthesis around feeling. You know the injectable hyaluronic acid gel better known as Juvederm made by the same makers of Botox.
Can this gel really erase these almost 50-year-old smile folds from around my mouth still allowing me to smile? Or delete my wrinkles even for a short while?
Don’t know. I’ll revisit the should I question in a few years. Right now, I’m not sure if any of these magical whiteouts are for me. In the meantime, I’ll continue to wrinkle with time taking preventive measures with over-the-counter anti-aging creams and sunblock.
Honestly, I’m too afraid of getting pricked every five to six months as the Botox and fillers begin to diminish. And besides, I’ve seen a few episodes of Botched. LOL. (research products and the preforming physician for safety. sisterslikeus.com are not doctors or claim to be).
Aspire to Inspire!
October is ending in a couple days, and what a month.
The month of October isn’t just for tricks and treats on Halloween; sharing superstitious stories on Friday the 13th (2017), or Christopher Columbus sailing across waters anymore. Continue reading The Serious Side of October
I am thankful, to be aware of my family’s health history.
Comprised, 80% of women, who have shared information about breast, and ovarian cancer; diabetes, heart disease and many other illnesses.
Yet, I was disheartened to learn, that my elders; grandmother, mother, also my aunts. Neglected to share the changes that come with women aging. I’m referring to perimenopause.
I’ve suffered from reproductive issues; like fibroids and cysts, to name a few. So, my menstrual varied each month. I was delighted when they began to come less often. What I was not excited about are the mood swings, low energy, poor concentration and the sweat baths.
Struggling, getting a good night’s sleep, due to pain. And, taking sleeping aids, switching to 100 % cotton sheets from Egyptian (contains polyester materials). My nights became a total nightmare. Nightly visits from Freddy Krueger (Elm Street), tearing off blankets; putting them back on, one leg in-one leg out, horribly tossing and turning. It was like I was being trained by Mr. Miyagi (original Karate Kid) while I slept. Loosing very little weight, and gaining nothing, but stress.
Over time, the hot flashes decreased, with fewer periods. My gynecologist suggests using black cohosh (more info here). I had used black cohosh tea, for past issues. Eventually, with diet change, and fewer visits, my sleep increased and I begin to feel better.
For nine months, things were great. With no menstrual cycle, I had worn, more white pants, and shorts then I have my entire lifetime. Until I received a surprise gift-spotting. Yes, it came back! The first month was scary. Remembering a conversation with my mother, stating spotting after gone through menopause. A sign of a possible problem, like ovarian cancer, she was sadly diagnosed having.
Worries End and Sharing
I stopped worrying if the spotting (turned period) could be cancerous when Freddy showed up in the middle of a sweet dream. Angry, having to deal with the most unpleasant and frequently hot flashes popping up at any moment. I was furious.
But, I’ve gotten over being disappointed with my relatives not sharing their personal experiences with perimenopause. I’ve found courageous women on the internet, sharing their menopausal journey. A trip, we as women, will travel at some point in our lives. Take heed sisters! This is your warning.
Sisters, my opinion on premenopausal is this. It has its pluses and minuses. Trading in painful cramps, for hot flashes, periods showing up, interfering with life; for white jeans; and less bloating to looking great. Adjusting to summers are difficult, so learn to appreciate cotton clothing. It’s a natural material, that breathes.
Aspire to Inspire!
All rights reserved by D. M. Dean Productions and Dawn Dean
Someone asked me the other day. Why should we be happy and settle on celebrating black history month once a year? I understood their question. Why isn’t black history talked about more often publicly? Why do we wait for our children school’s to touch on the topic once a year? Only sharing the stories of the well known; like Rosa Park or Fredrick Douglas when there are so many other amazing stories to explore and tell. In many cases, black history is being taught by educators, who really cannot comprehend or relate-a little to what they are teaching. How could they without living in a black shell, fully experiencing the struggles of the Black American?