In the Beginning
In my late adolescent years, change didn’t frighten or define me. I’d pack a suitcase and purchase a one-way Greyhound ticket. Wave goodbye and freely shout “see-you-when-I-see-you” to family and friends.
I’d start a new job without fear or concern as to what anyone thought of me or my performance. I always gave 110% to whatever I did, but, I was fearless-confident in me.
Being a mother, having a partner to compromise with (who eventually left), and the responsibilities of rent, car note, old man time, etc., etc. I begin to resent change. New was no longer fun or adventurous for me.
The lost of love-ones meant I was getting old and needed to have more to show for my age. The growth of once innocent child’s transforming into adults meant an empty home. I wrapped myself up in others needs and wants forgetting about my own, so when change begin to bring more pain than joy. I could not handle it.
My thoughts became, who was going to take care of me? What was I going to do with a shell of a house? I felt used, frighten and angry with myself for not have loved myself, as well as, I have loved others so dearly.
The Change Came
I have always known God and understood He has a greater plan for me. But, falling ill and now living alone. I soon realized in the end, I only have me, myself and God to rely on. So I had to make a change and embrace what is. What was and what I could and could not change about my life.
I can’t cure myself of something I don’t completely understand (only God can), but I could improve my health, by changing eating habits and exercise. I can’t bring back my best friend or family members that have left before me. But, I can remember their love, their support they gave me and how they influenced me in being the woman I am.
Change is going to come like the seasons. So embrace it and know it will pass by, leaving you in a better place, with time.
Aspire to Inspire!
By Dawn M. Dean
Founder and Creative Director
Sisters like Us