Does your mirror(s) have you feeling some type of away?
It is called the Mirror Effects.
We, as in women, feel good about the outfit choices we had to dig out from the back of our crammed closets.
Our clothes feel pleasantly comfy against our bodies until, something as simple as catching our reflection in a mirror; takes away what we had imagined looked like Kelly Rowland in a Fabletics commercial or Halle Berry on a strolling the beach. It was merely an illusion.
What do we do?
We begin to beat ourselves up, well, down.
Negative thoughts trickle in, we start to body shame ourselves; there is an energy shift, and we become an emotional wreck stressing over finding something to wear that covers all our outer flaws.
The Fix
Years after much therapy, I came up with this brilliant trick.
Have you seen the movie Snow White and the Huntsman? Do you recall the part when Queen Raveena asks the gold-shiny thing the question, who is the fairest of them all?
Well, the Evil Queen does not see her reflection staring back at her as she frantically paces back and forth to see if there is news of someone somewhere across the land better than her.
She patiently waits for the round glistening tin to form into a man where her quest has sent him on a Google search across the wide web.
He collects the information as to whom is the most beautiful on Instagram and Facebook while gathering himself at her feet. For her to discover it is not she, the fairest of them all.
Angrily she deliberates how could it not be her after all her efforts to stay relevant?
That is how I feel, as the Queen did when my mirror tells me the truth about how I look in leggings: any clothing.
Getting dressed sometimes feels as if Tony Robbins put a spell on me like in the film Shallow Hal. I step out of my closet believing and feeling one way to facing the hard truth in the mirror, feeling another way.
So, I developed a foolproof technique. A trick better than any magic trick Harry could ever think to conjure up.
See, the trick to looking and feeling good all the time is to see yourself through a mirrorless mirror (picture frame).
Even if my reality is my stomach bulging over the top of my pants, tits dragging the ground like this new fashion craze; I am always beautiful because I can visually see myself; my realness inside.
Not the reflecting cinnamon rolls rising around my waistline or where gravity has stretched and pulled my triceps and sagging boobs so low my granddaughters could jump double dutch with them.
And we must not forget the loose neck skin that makes grandma look as though she has magically turned into a turkey.
You see, The Mirrorless Mirror is a magic wand that forces you to see you, the inner self, those parts of you that get you into heaven: the most important part.
Let me be clear!
Now let me be clear. I am not saying, in any shape or form. I will strut out into the streets wearing a jumpsuit that fits like my infant grandchild onesie; busting at the steams like someone accidentally punctured a can of biscuits because I feel so darn beautiful inside after catching a glimpse of my inner self.
No. But what I am saying. It that in those moments, when I begin to beat myself up because I ate too many fries, overly indulged in the Costco’s variety pack of Cheesecake Factory cheesecakes; eat an entire bag of Hersey Kisses in one setting, or womanly monthly things. Hanging an empty picture frame on the wall does the trick every time.
So, if you are tired of walking around with bruises and black eyes you give yourself. Try my brilliant trick and get your confidence back.
Warning: Do not try this alone. You will see the real you. Some parts may be scary for some.
Head over to @sisterslikeuswin on Instagram to see how the mirror effect affected me.
Remember, whichever flower you choose to be BLOOM!
Does success equal a fancy car, a compound that can house twelve families, only three people occupy the space? Or is success any size home filled with the things we love most like: family and friends, laughter, with moments adorning the walls, and the aroma of tranquility filling the rooms?
Success for me is a place of being true to self with a heart of gratitude. That way, wherever I may go, I am unapologetically happy with who I am and what I do.
I have always been one to go after what I wanted. I wanted it so badly I neglected my physical and mental health thriving to achieve material things. Do not get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with working hard or having material things unless those things like my case compromise your overall well-being.
Success is done with balance. Balancing the mind, body, spirit, financials, and relationships
Do not allow achieving things to define who you are or let those objects become your face (identity) because you have lost yourself. Society teaches us from childhood that more equals success and that it should be achieved in a particular order.
I watched Little Fires Everywhere over the weekend, and boy did Elena (Reese Witherspoon) need a match lit under her.
Reese, Elena, compromised her true love, true happiness for the life she thought was her life dream because society tells us by a certain age we should have; graduate college, gotten married, bought a house, had children, and to retire old.
Reese’s character loved her picture-perfect life if it looked good on the surface, catching an attitude with any and everyone around her if her family didn’t look like perfection to others.
Sometimes the view in the mirror is not so perfect. Old Unhealthy Selfie
Bitter about having birthed a fourth child, Elena shames others about their life choices, pointing the finger, revealing their mistakes and flaws when fact she should be examining her own life and actions. But the view in the mirror is not so perfect as she would find out.
By the end of the series, Reese has found her match Mia, played by Kerry Washington, and is awaken unusually by those who love her most.
I found this series binge-worthy, coming away with so many eye-opening moments about how differently we as humans measure success, living with our decisions, racism, mental health, and sexuality.
We all are in the pursuit of happiness and simply want to live a happy life uniquely as ourselves.
How do you measure success?
Many of us have gotten caught up in this rat race, sadly missing out on true happiness living the life society has measured as success.
We become slaves to the rhythm (system), to someone else’s definition of success measuring up to the likes of our parents, teachers, peers, etc.
Have you lost your identity just to fit in, to be accepted, to feel like you have succeeded?
Can you look in the mirror and like what is looking back at you?
Remember, whichever flower you choose to be BLOOM.
Please leave your thoughts and comments on this article and check out Instagram @sisterslikeuswin
Are you stuck in limbo trying to move forward but with each step forward you are knocked three steps back?
Below are 12 (plus a bonus) possible reasons why you cannot move beyond stuck.
1. Attitude: A negative attitude about your circumstances equals negative energy and a negative outcome.
Try looking on the bright side even if life tends to only show the dark side.
2. Blaming: Pointing fingers, blaming others get you nowhere except where you are-stuck.
Try standing in the mirror pointing your finger at yourself. After all, you are the boss of your life, and no one forced you to make your decisions but you.
However, do not waddle in the past too long, for if you do, you will be stuck in the past.
3. Clutter: Having a cluttered mind blogged down with un-useful baggage only takes you to Never-Neverland. Never happy. Never satisfied. Never a win.
Accept whatever happened, process it, and let it go.
Not everything or everyone is meant or deserves to travel along your personal journey. So, make room for those who and new possibilities.
4. Distractions: Turn off the TV, and your email and social media notifications then place your phone on vibrate and put it in another room.
Because guess what? It ain’t going anywhere until you stroll through it or delete it. And if you miss something, it was not meant for you to see.
Distractions can steal time. Do not let it rob you.
5. Focus: Well, the lack of it.
Focusing on too many tasks is exhausting; believe me, I know all too well.
Multi-tasking is not what it used to be with so many technical distractions dinging in the background.
Try focusing on one task or idea at a time, and not move on to the next until that one has been completed. More will get done this way, and anxiety will be less.
Have you found why you are stuck? Continue reading to discover your reason
6. Gratitude: Gratitude is the best attitude cause when we underappreciate what we have it appears we have nothing when we have plenty.
By focusing and appreciating the things that truly matter gives true gratification and fulfillment of abundance that pushes us to do more for those things that matter in our lives. In return, we get stuff accomplished.
7. Habits: Bad habits are like poison. Doing too much of anything could destroy us. This includes binge-watching (time management), consuming too many unhealthy foods, and living in the past.
Being mindful breaks bad habits if it takes 14 or 60 days to get rid of them, one first must be cognizant that they are bad habits.
8. Identity: Have you lose yourself to society?
Not knowing who you hinder you from finding your life’s purpose.
It is important to discover when you lost yourself to the world that has injected its opinions of who they deem you should be is the key to being and living your authentic self.
It is no easy task, but you can be found.
9. Kindhearted: Find it difficult to say no, and not regret saying it?
No, is a sentence and no one should feel guilty about saying it.
Being an empath myself, I have had my share of difficulties saying no and not retracting it in the next breath.
But saying no to others means saying yes to you, your own desires, and valuable time spent on identifying you and your purpose.
I say, say no, and say it like you mean it the first time.
10. Mindset: Is your mind shackled to what society trained it to believe? Chained to the lie, you are to work your younger years, retire old, and die poor and broken?
Sorry to be so morbid, but that is how many live their lives believing we live to only pay bills and die.
Life and death are both certainties, but life is so much more than working yourself into the grave.
Life is what we make it, and God created it where we all prosper by giving each of us gifts to obtain abundance and joy.
Our mindset-thoughts, plays an important role in how we live between our born date and decease date.
We can either live out loud and unapologetically or live in the shadows afraid to think for ourselves and grow from the seeds gifted us.
Caring about what others think of us controls give others control of our minds and life, fear keeps us from thriving, and our attitude will keep us from flourishing with purpose.
Fine-tune your way of thinking, be opened-minded, and see what may bloom.
Working from Home
11. Opportunity: Do you believe the lack of opportunity is keeping you planted in sinking sand?
In 2020 many gained and lost. Those who gained adapted to the way the world starting to operate. While others were not so sure of how to adjust to the quick changes.
Doors have not always opened for women or people of color. So many times, we fit in where we can.
But many women are shifting their mindsets and going for broke. Meaning they are making a way out of no way no matter the cost.
Women are amongst the fastest growing business owners, and it does not look like they will be slowing down anytime soon because sisters like us win.
Being pushed out of a job beyond their control, forced to work from home due to the 2020 virus lockdown allowed women more time to create or work their side hustles: a win-win situation.
No doors have ever magically opened for me. It took hard work, determination, and preparation when opportunity knocked.
But with today’s technology, opportunities are available at our fingertips from in the comfort of our own homes. To me, the virus forced us to seize opportunities while allowing us to utilize the gifts we were blessed with.
Permitting us to build our own doors of opportunity on a strong foundation.
12. Perfection: Nothing is perfect. So, if you are waiting to perfect your craft, a business plan, or figure, you will be waiting forever.
Perfectionism is like a disease with procrastination as a symptom.
Striving for perfection only causes us to overthink and underproduce; it causes fear and doubts in our abilities to do.
If you are a perfectionist, you are fearful of failing or succeeding, you care too much about what others think of you, and you will continue to be stuck in an unrealistic world if you continue to let perfection hold you back from doing.
BONUS
My Browns are Beautiful
13. Comparing: Do you find yourself scrolling through social media feeds comparing yourself to others? If your answer is yes, sometimes, you will be stuck on Fantasy Island until you realize and appreciate your own talents and beauty.
When we compare ourselves to others, we are telling ourselves we are not enough. But what and how God created for you is for you.
You are divinely crafted to stand out from the crowd and serve in your own unique way.
Be you, your incomparable self.
I hope you find your way out of the maze of stuck with these 12 (plus the bonus) reasons why you cannot move beyond stuck.
Please leave a comment if you need more reasons as to why you cannot move beyond stuck.
I’ve gone from a 1010 square feet apartment that offered two bedrooms, two full baths with a laundry/storage closet within the unit to a 730 square feet one-bedroom apartment, one bath: without laundry inside the apartment unit (access in the building).
About ten years ago, we, as in myself and my children, resided in a five-bedroom single-family home. It had always been a dream of mines to live in a large house that had a big backyard surrounded by soothing noises of nature where the kiddos could swing or swim in a pool.
My children would all begin to exit high school by the time we moved into our largest home. But nevertheless, we got to experience the joys and pains of living in a single-family house.
The house did not have a pool in the back yard or in the community, but a wood swing set stood in the wide-opened backyard. I love the look and the easy care of the hardwood floors throughout and space to entertain family and friends during the holidays and special occasions like birthdays and baby showers.
Pruning the small flower garden in the spring and summer months was relaxing, but unfortunately, nature was not always so calming.
We experienced raccoon and fox invasions, spiders the size of our hands, the spawn of mosquitoes, and a lot of leaves to rake during the fall season: a townhouse would be easier to maintain.
So as each child earned their walk across the stage, grabbing their high school diplomas from the administrative hands. They were ready to spread their wings to take off into the real world and, downsizing begin.
I climbed and reached that goal to live in a five-bedroom home then downsizing from a four townhouse to a two-bed apartment with a den to two bedrooms, and now a one but I think I need a little more space.
And yes, they have all left the nest visiting often. I have to say I am a proud momma. But I never had imagined myself here in my smallest home to date (#lifeatdawns).
The downside of downsizing
Making it work with one bathroom.
If you are thinking of downsizing: BEWARE. There are as many cons as there are pros to tiny living.
Many have been forced to downsize or are considering it due to these unknown times. And I am here to tell those thinking of doing so, it can be challenging. Well, I know for me it was the most challenging move to date moving amid corona.
The search for a place to live is stressful enough, but to add the corona lockdown on top of packing, working from home, and one flood issue after another I was experiencing in my then apartment had me stretched to my limits.
However, I survived the madness, experiencing the downside to downsizing: the lack of storage space is the biggest downfall.
I did a quick walkthrough of the unit I reside in now and decided on it because it has a walk-in closet in the bedroom, a coat closet, and a large linen closet: plus a small storage unit in the building.
In my mind, as I rushed through it: masked, it appeared to offer room to store my clothing, coats, linens, and DIY materials if I got rid of my five totes of Christmas decorations. Boy was a wrong (closet post coming soon)! I am still purging my clothes post-move in almost four months later.
Another con is not having a separate guest room when the g-kids visit and my daughter visits from out Florida.
In my old place, the second bedroom served as my office and guest room. Now I am trying to figure out if I should purchase a futon, sleeper sofa, or the chesterfield sofa I’ve wanted for many years for the living room. Whatever buy, I need it to be a transitional piece for when I upsize into a house.
Some other cons to downsizing are entertainment space, sharing one bathroom with guests, and purging of sentimental items.
I had an old Singer sewing machine that belonged to my mother that needed to be serviced.
I recall the day she and I walked into Walmart to buy it. She did not know how to sew, so I kept the machine at my house.
I didn’t want to let it go and wouldn’t have but, I had received a new one as a Christmas gift a few years back and decided to let my moms go in the move.
Why I Did It & Pros to Downsizing
Florida Trees
Several things played a role in my decision to downsize. You can say I was somewhat influenced by this Tiny Living concept all over the home décor channels and social media but also the pros of downsizing.
I watched a TV show once where a family of six shopped for a tiny house to move from a 2500 square foot house to a 600 tiny square foot house to get out of debt and save for their children’s college funds and thought, if they could with a family of that size, I could easily manage to live in a smaller footprint.
But I have questioned my decision many times after moving in. And wish those television shows would follow up with a Where Are They Now series? I am curious to learn how they are surviving seeing how I still find myself all over the place to find a spot for what I still own.
Also, some years ago, I watched a documentary on the happiest countries in the world and how people living in Denmark have less stress and are happier having less stuff to worry about.
Viewing countless shows since then on how other countries: people are living longer lives than many areas of America living with so much and the benefits of tiny living. I said, why not?
The Pros and Benefits to Downsizing
The pros and benefits would be to have more time with my family and friends creating and writing, less time cleaning. It would permit saving more for traveling, investing, and education and less cost in utility bills in return for lesser energy usage that impact world climate.
As I stated, in the cons, sharing one bathroom with my guest is a big downsize: I kind of wish I had a separate half bathroom for them to use.
However, one of the best lessons I have learned in downsizing is what I want and do not want when buying a home.
Sisters, I am still settling into my small cozy space, so visit again to see how I decorator and differentiate zones for the apartment to function.
The photo above is sneak peek at how I decorated the bathroom to escape the DMV (D.C., MD. & VA.) weather this fall and winter based on my Florida trips.
With fall here and old man winter around the corner, flu and allergy season has sprung. Where usually us seasonal sufferers would know what to accept and what to stock the medicine cabinet with, we still known little about the coronavirus, and our leaders cannot predict what this fall/winter season may bring.
Like the flu, the coronavirus is believed to be viral and can be passed along touching surfaces covered with the virus.
As the latest news and social media reports, catching the flu virus this year is the least of people’s concerns with vaccinations available.
But what is to be excepted this season with the corona vaccinations in its early stages of development.
Will water, tissue, and hand sanitizing products fly off the shelves like the beginning of the (COVID-19), or are suppliers and pharmaceutical companies stocked and prepared?
Though health officials are working on a vaccination. News stations and health officials have been saying to take the same precautions as the flu, washing hands, disinfecting doorknobs, etc. But what harm comes with using these chemicals more frequently and inhaling them, I have wondered?
Anyhow, I will let the scientist do their job while practicing safe distancing and coughing etiquette.
Below are some ways I will practice to avoid contracting the flu, coronavirus, and anything else hanging around on home or public surfaces.
Proper Handwashing:
1. Turn warm to hot (add cold water as needed for children’s safety) faucet water on with one hand.
2. Wet hands
3. Add soap to wet hands
4. Lather both hands covering all areas including under the nails and forearm if able
5. Scrub for a minimum of 25-30 seconds (we say the alphabets in my home…26 letters)
6. Rinse under the warm to hot water (safe temperature)
7. DO NOT touch faucet knobs after washing hands
8. To turn the water off. Use a napkin, paper towel, and or toilet cover/paper to turn the water
9. Discard used tissue into the trash
10. Use a clean napkin or tissue paper if using a public restroom if there is a doorknob or pull to open the door
(wear gloves if able)
Parents may wish to demonstrate with smaller children the proper way of handwashing if your child will be returning to in-class sessions.
Coughing Etiquette 101
With allergy season here, coughing, and sneezing is sure to come as the leaves fall and, in some area’s snowfall.
And it may feel good letting it rip there is an elegant way to cough and sneeze.
Before letting loose, be considerate of those around you. Try having clean tissue on hand to cough or sneeze into to prevent spraying others nearby or the air.
Now maybe a great time to stock up on tissues before winter falls and spring bloom.
Look for soft tissues with aloe or lotion to protect the skin around the nose that will not irritate sinuses further. Try avoiding those tissues that can add to the problem that seems to come with dust bunnies (lent particles).
The respectful way to cough and sneeze
Cover the mouth with some type of disposable cloth like a Kleenex; clean napkin, or paper towel, or cough directly into the inner corner of the elbow to avoid showering others. By all means, avoid coughing or sneezing into the hands. Doing so, then meeting surfaces others also will come in contact with helps the spread of viruses such as the flu and the coronavirus.
Home Tip
Try to schedule a time to wipe down commonly used surfaces like doorknobs, faucets in the bathroom and kitchen, phones, and computers if family members are in and out of the home.
Practicing these safeties can help reduce the spread of germs, viruses, and bacteria.
Health is Wealth! And safety practice keeps us safe!
I have learned the hard way about the importance of a clean and healthy mind, body, and spirit.
I have learned the hard way about the importance of a clean and healthy mind, body, and spirit.
Our health is our biggest asset and like all things, our bodies break down as we age and or overtime from poor diet or environment. And often it is the functions of our minds that tend to decline first.
After learning from trial and error, I started my journey to living a more fulfilling and healthier lifestyle. Making the required and necessary changes to be around for my family and to do what I was born to do: create and to serve others.
Below are 10 essentials for the mind, body, and spirit, I practice to allow myself to be available for my family and, to live with intention and purpose doing the two things I love; creative writing (content) and helping others.
Let’s Win!
Sleep:
With so many things on our daily do list, someone that it was wise to coin the phrase “I’ll sleep when I die. But why starve ourselves from sleep to possibly dying early from a lack of it?
The adequate amount of sleep is overlooked because our minds are always focused on what we need to do if we aren’t already doing it.
But sleep is just as important for the body as water and food.
A lack of sleep can result in sleep disorders such as Sleep Deprivation and Deficiency.
These conditions can lead to heart failure and disease, and obesity which can cause other health issues, like high blood pressure, stroke, and depression. Health issues like these can wreak havoc on an already stressed and unbalanced body and mind.
Try getting 6-8 hours of sleep each night by sticking to a bedtime schedule, not watching TV, or eating an hour or two before bed, and avoiding caffeinated drinks.
However, I understand everyone’s body is different. One person may be able to function from 4 hours of sleep where someone like me who requires 8 straight hours of sleep, so I do not wake up fog minded and tired the next day. But are you giving your body enough time to rejuvenate and correct (heal) itself?
Benefits of a good night sleep:
1. Brain function and emotional health: good sleep helps improves your memory
the body renews and heals itself
2. Reduces the stress level hormone cortisone and high blood pressure
3. It can help reduce inflammation in the body. Inflammation is thought to cause body deterioration, causing things like arthritis.
4. Can help you lose weight by less stress less emotional eating while up.
Believe:
It is said that little is required, having faith as small as a mustard seed. I always tell people; my faith is a watermelon full of seeds.
Believing in God and that my life has a purpose is what has led me to this day. Knowing I was created to build on the world created by someone…something bigger than me, bigger than human beings with my best interest at heart gotten me through the most difficult moments.
Causes me to believe in myself, my talents, and helping others.
When faith begins to dimmish, look back at all the things you’ve survived, how you survived, and be thankful for the lessons in the adversities. You did not give up or give in so, your faith is stronger than you know,
Life will knock us around and the test is sure to come but believing in my self, the universe is key
I like to move it move it!
I think the Madagascar charters were on to something.
Move:
Wealth is Health
I learned the hard way how important working out is for the body particularly stretching and cardio exercises.
As we age our bodies not only begin to lose muscle mass but harder to absorb calcium and vitamin D necessary for healthy bones. This opens the body for injuries like breaks and bone shrinkage.
Because everything in our bodies is connected in some sort of way, should one area of the body weakens; over time the connected areas will weaken may leading to conditions such as arthritis, etc.
Exercise moves like weight strengthening can help maintain muscle while stretching can prevent ligaments from tearing and cardio workouts help with blood circulation.
Benefits of moving (exercising):
1. Reduce body fat- excessive body fat can lead to obesity, diabetes, and poor heart health
2. Improve mental health-increases the happy hormone serotonin
3. Increase energy
4. Relieves stress
5. Strengthen bones and muscles
Diet:
Our diets are one of the most crucial parts of our being, and the saying, we are what we eat is true.
Improper diet can lead to overweight in which then leads to more serious health conditions.
Water is the most essential to any form of life. It not only hydrates our insides and helps with blood flow, but it also affects our skin.
I always know when I have not had enough water by my skin will either become oily or ruddy looking.
Benefits and truths of a good diet:
1. A healthy body results in a higher performance
2. Veggies equal life, sugar equals problems
3. Water makes the blood flow around
4. Water promotes radiance skin
5. Healthy eating keeps diseases away
Socialize:
It is normal: human nature to socialize with other human beings. But with safe distancing due to this 2020 virus, we had been advised to stay inside.
Homeschooling, and working from the dining room, this pandemic has impeded our time to physically socialize as we normally and freely did. Thus forcing us to find other ways to communicate with our families and friends and the outside world.
Social distancing or interacting with others can take a psychological toll on a person over time. And we must interact with the elder and children who may be alone or can’t wrap their heads around what is happening during this time.
I believe it is important that children, especially, socialize to build the needed skills to learn how to interact with other cultures to learn how to handle conflicts and differences.
Socializing builds life experiences and people skills. So during this unpredictable time safety is practiced using technology.
The technology industry is forever changing. More and more apps are created and utilized to engage from the walls of our homes.
Platforms such as Zoom, Messenger, or face timing through our phone’s apps have allowed me to see my family and network with others.
It is mentally important to interact with others, especially now with the fall and winter shorter daylight hours, where the weather doesn’t permit outdoor activities.
Benefits of socializing:
1. Takes the mind off your worries
2. Increases the happy hormone
3. Offer growth by learning from others and, about yourself
4. Physical connection
5. Feeling of belonging: loved, needed
Escape:
When we often think of escape, traveling (vacation) usually comes first to mind. But there are so many means to escape.
My mother was an avid reader, who I would find most times curled up at the arm of her sofa reading a book. She was well diverse in her studies with a wide vocabulary. I many times phoned her to spell a read. That was many years ago, I have since then picked up more books, and utilize Google’s dictionary.
Escaping does not have to mean booking a flight or hotel. It can be as easy as looking within ourselves, our imaginations, meditation in nature, if only for a moment.
Create:
Escape into your own imagination rather it be journaling, painting, or coming up with some new recipes off the fly.
I enjoy writing poetry and film concepts. I’ll play around with outfits and hair just to see what I will come up with.
Going through my health issues, poetry was my way to escape the madness of pain. This in turn helped me process what I was going through.
I wrote and published my first book of poems with a publishing company surrounding my daily debilitating pain.
I found myself writing my best poetry and best ideas when life looked bleak.
Creativity is freeing and expressive! Find something that speaks to your inner being and create from within.
Nature:
Call me a free-spirit or a nature enthusiastic but walking along the ocean or between tall green trees is the most relaxing thing I do for my mental health.
It is my way to escape and refresh without cost and come away with so many benefits.
Throughout my Instagram postings, you can see how much I love to be out in nature.
Walking through tall trees, grassy roadsides; discovering how the other creations of God’s life are adventuring and enlightening.
The birds and butterflies seem unbothered by the issues concerning the world, giving a feeling of peace, a stillness I would say.
The believer looks at the birds in the sky, that do not reap nor gather into the barns, and trust that the Father will provide.
Matthew 6:26
Nature walks always reminds me that there is a higher power than myself. It reveals how animals experience the same obstacles as we humans and everything will be ok.
When I am stressing over things out of my control, I turn to nature to re-center and re-focus on what is good in my life and in the world.
No, not everyone is an outdoor enthusiastic such as me but there are other ways to experience nature like nature recordings (soothing), nature and planet inspired television shows, and video (educational).
Mingle with nature. Create a place in the backyard, or on the patio to take in nature or, simply stroll a park. Trust when I say you will find it rewarding.
Let the music play!
Music:
Music is more than a sound to dance to, it is another way of escaping from the mundane of everyday living with influencing and transformational powers.
It forces us to conjure the energy to start and finish tasks that otherwise would not have gotten done i.e. working out or cleaning the house.
Like books, music can take us to a place in time letting the flight of the imagination swarm freely.
In the early mornings, I will listen to gospel music: it helps me to start my day centered around God and His plans for my life. With gratitude, my noon playlist consists of songs that evoke me to write poetry and or film ideas. And by evening, I must tone into a classical station to mute my mind circling with scenes before I rest for the night.
Some benefits I have found listening to music are:
1. Inspirational
2. Transportive
3. Energizing
4. Reflective
5. Calming
Pamper:
For me, pampering is a little more than doing my hair or nails. It is the total package of self-care; the mind, body, and spirit. It is the power of having awareness when it is needed and knowing when to say no.
We as women will neglect ourselves to make sure our partners, children, and friends are ok first before we ask ourselves the very question.
Keep silent and not ask for help when we are drowning, so overwhelmed we distract ourselves by keeping busy with everyone else from our own needs. Superhero is our strength, but it is also what weakness and destroys our minds, our bodies, and dreams over time.
I’ve wondered if the cause of others mistreating us, is because we have miss treated ourselves.
Looking good, makes us feel good but, feeling and being mentally and emotionally good is what makes us good and overboil with confidence from the inside out.
Below is a list of things that may give reasons to step away from playing super mom, wife, or boss for some needed relaxing and rejuvenation-self-care.
1. Explained weight gain caused by stress
2. Overeating
3. Overthinking
4. Anxiety
5. Feeling depressed or not worthy
6. Lack of concentration
I hope these 10 essentials will help and encourage you to live a healthier lifestyle and win.
Hello! I’m Dawn Dean, the personality and author behind SistersLikeUs.com (SLUWiN), and the author of Cracks in the Pavement: Struggles of Butterflies. Follow along to see what, how and why I created this spot to express my creative side while encouraging others to win.
Q: What is SistersLikeUs.com?
A: SistersLikeUs.com is a platform created to inspire women, and men to win.
Q: How?
A: It inspires women and men to win by encouraging and demonstrating how a positive mind, a healthy body, and the conscious awareness of the spirit-soul(being), presence within each of us connects to help us thrive. The soul for me is our surroundings i.e. our home, the company we keep, and nature.
Q: Why did I create SistersLikeUs.com?
A: I created SistersLikeUs.com out of chaos, a need to vent, then realizing I wasn’t alone and others could benefit from my stories of life’s ups and downs.
The Story behind the Why.
In the late 90’s I was living a happy life before my body would show me just how important one’s health truly is.
A single mother of three, thriving as a manager at a large well-known department store without a degree under my belt (only college credits).
I was a hard worker striving to become a buyer for the May company. But physical pain setup camp never to dismantle.
I was diagnosed with lupus and fibromyalgia. I dreaded a career change, but the agonizing pain left no options.
I would soon find myself setting behind a desk but I loved working retail and meeting new people every day. For a period I worked full-time as a Staffing Manager at a temporary agency and for a short time as an Executive Assistance at a public relation firm (PR) before landing a job at a pharmaceutical association.
After two-and-a-half years working in the membership and marketing department, my health seriously declines. Losing the job meant losing health insurance and the means to provide for my growing children. I gave up.
Being what I call a functional depressive for as long as I could remember, I would succumb to the dark side of depression. Unable to bear the loss of my health; job, family members, and friends. I could no longer function even a little bit without putting on the pretend mask; a smiling mask to hide all my pain.
It would take me seven years before I would seek professional help.
Fortunately I found a great therapist who saw me-Dawn; the loving mother, the creative writer and poet, and the compassionate and helpful woman buried beneath life’s debris.
She helped me reignite the flickering flame burning deep within wanting to resurface. She helped me to visualize a life beyond my adversities (Thank you, Denise!).
After many years visiting her-therapist and her eventually retiring. I took what she had relayed, unveiled and the things she saw in me to push past my setbacks.
I came to understand and accept that my emotional and physical pain was God’s way of forcing me to live in my true purpose–to tell my stories.
Though I had had my own life goals mapped out (but also loved writing). He had bigger plans for me.
And so my pain would form the blossoming of SistersLikeUs.com Where We Win! Designed to help others overcome life’s adversities in order to WIN.
Everyone has a story. How are you using yours? I’m telling mine’s to inspire others.
I hope each post will uplift and encourage your growth in some way
Thank you for subscribing to SistersLikeUs.com and following our growth to win.
When people think of spring cleaning, more-often-than-not, they prep to clean out the closet space and trash those expired foods in the kitchen cabinets. Tossing out old and scuffed shoes, pots and pans; giving away or donating ill-fitting jeans and favorite shirts they swore they’d lose weight to fit after the holidays. But it’s spring, sadly that shirt still doesn’t fit well. And some stay clear of shining or power washing the windows.
I can relate. However, spring cleaning your home is important but there’s much more to purging or throwing away worn clothes once a year to living well.
These steps in my, ABC’s of Spring Cleansing: Jump Start to a Zealous Lifestyle program helps with the common activities of spring cleaning, as well, as teaches those viable areas that can enrich every aspect of life.
I must stress, it’s a little more in-depth then dropping off a bag or two at your local Goodwill or Salvation Army stores for a tax write-off. These tips were designed to de-clutter the mind, body, and soul (space) from my own personal experiences.
I’ve learned it takes 21 to 90 consistent days to rid oneself of bad habits and to grow from learning and implementing new ones. Let’s just say, you can’t be on a diet for three weeks then off for two weeks and except that weight is going to stay off. It is a lifestyle change! It takes practice to become the norm, the same with cleaning out bad habits.
Over the next 21 days, I will be giving away free information on the A, the B, and the C tactics I use to reboot my mind, body, and soul; permitting me to stay focus on reaching my new year’s goals (new book Amazon.com Cracks in the Pavement: Struggle of Butterflies). Where most have already given up and tossed their goals out the window.
I’ll share a few reasons as to why some are unable to shed those pounds and why some can’t seem to get their life’s together and other’s can.
You can! You will!
21 Day Agenda:
7 days re-setting the MIND: Thoughts have power
7 days re-building the BODY: How important it is
7 days re-energizing the SOUL(SPACE): What matters most
Don’t Give Up…
Why give up on your dreams. Life can be difficult to maneuver through, but we weren’t designed to give up. We were born to WIN!
Today’s the last day of 2018. You may be beating yourself over the head wondering, “why didn’t I achieve my goals this year?”
Did you want to lose those extra five pounds; start your own business, take a class, or travel abroad, but checked nothing off your to-do list?
Perhaps, what has kept you from reaching those goals, are your daily habits. You know that ones, they are comfortable, and you’ve grown accustomed too.
How many times in a day, we might have said, I’ll do it later; later comes, we put it off until tomorrow-then tomorrow comes, oh I’ll get to it sooner or later.
Procrastination does not only put things off, it creates clutter, not only in our physical spaces but also in our mental space. It shortens your fulfillment in life.
Often, we are, unaware of how the boxes in the corner, a pile of clothes needing folding, and the kids’ toys spread throughout the living space causes us stress. That eventually leads to emotional eating, which turns into unhealthy weight gain or loss, bringing on medical issues that cause a domino’s; slowly but surely, everything starts to crumble at your feet.
How many times, have you told yourself, I can’t take a trip or start that business class? Why? Because you’ve told yourself you couldn’t, so you didn’t.
You did not achieve your goals in 2018 because of your I can’t beliefs or procrastination habits.
What we tell ourselves, is what we believe, and is what we will receive.
Our thoughts are provoking so, let’s start the New Year, with a New Mindset, with New Habits to live a New Lifestyle.